What the fuck is WRONG with people???

We’ve been living in the same house for nearly 3 years. We have a beautiful 3 bedroom, 3 bath house. A large great room and an equally large dining room with a spacious kitchen. It’s on a large piece of corner property in very close proximity to my sons school.

I love my home. Loved it from the moment I saw it.

How we came to live here was really incredible. We were living in a substantially smaller house with a landlord who was an absolute monster. Hotband and I were kicking around the idea of moving out for awhile, but never had the funds to do so. One day, my husband was speaking to a friend of his who had recently moved from my hometown to Utah. He was griping that his house in our town was still vacant and how hard it was for him to manage two mortgages. Kidding around, my husband suggested that we move into his old house and pay the rent there…equivalent to what his mortgage payment was.

Imagine our surprise when he LOVED this idea! So, we moved into his home. Everyone is now happy. We have this enormous house in a great neighborhood. We are actually friends with our landlord! The mortgage is reasonable and we drew up papers to rent the house with the intent to eventually buy it from them.

Ideal situation. Worked beautifully…until today.

I get a knock on my front door. A young guy, maybe in his twenties, hands me some paperwork and informs me that my house, my beautiful home…is being foreclosed upon.

What? I mean…WHAT???

Apparently, my husbands “friend” went through a nasty divorce with his wife. Why? Because “friend” is a crack addict and she threw him out. Since the house is in HIS name, Mrs. Crack Addict happily took our rent checks and never mailed them into the mortgage company to further fuck with Mr. Crack Addict. Now, his credit is shot…which is what she wanted, and in the interim, we have gotten fucked as well. All our payments for the past six months have gone to whatever the fuck she used them for. She never told us that HE was now the owner of the home, so of course, we dutifully continued making our payment to her as we have every month for nearly three years.

Everyone has advised us NOT to make any more payments to Mrs. Crack Addict. That’s obvious. Surely I am not going to support her with OUR money. So, I am setting up an escrow account with an attorney come Monday to make our rent payments to. You know, so we are showing good faith.

Who we are showing this “good faith” to, however, is unbeknownst to me.

I have twenty days to let the bank know what our intentions are with regard to the house. Do we intend to buy it or are we moving?

Well, shit. If I had known that I was going to have to buy this house outright from the bank, I would have stopped paying that rent a long time ago and parlayed it into our own mortgage. We aren’t financially in a position to put a large downpayment on the house.

“Don’t worry,” people have said. “It takes anywhere from six months to a year for a foreclosure to go through. You can live there rent free in the meantime.”

Right. Sound advice coming from a bunch of morons. I am so sick of listening to everyone try to find a silver lining in this mess.

We were not prepared for this. Caught us completely off guard. Blind sided us. I wrote the following message to Mr. Crack Addict on Facebook:

You’re a real piece of work, (Insert Crack Addicts Name Here).

When exactly were you going to let us know that you were letting the house fall into foreclosure? We are going to be evicted out of here by the bank. We pay our rent religiously every month. Where has it been going, because it sure as hell hasn’t made it to the bank.

We have CHILDREN, (Insert name here). A family to take care of. How could you be so insensitive to another family who has only supported you and your ex wife in friendship and kindness? Tell me, how do you sleep at night???


I know it isn’t going to mean shit to him, but it made me feel better writing it. Moreover, I didn’t use the words “douchebag”, “asshat”, “cocksucker” or “crackhead ball sucking dickwad”.

I am proud of that.

Anyway, Mr. Crack Addict got my message on Facebook and called the hotband.

“Dude, I am SO sorry. I had nothing to do with this. This was all Mrs. Crack Addict. I trusted her to make the mortgage payments even though the house was in my name. I’ll do whatever I can to make sure you guys get to stay in the house.”

Really, fuckhead? Like what? Get us a mortgage? Find us a nice fat downpayment hiding under a rock? Really. What the hell do you think you are going to do for us at this point in time.

My husband convinced him to write us a “recommendation” letter for the bank, stating that we have been good tenants and have always paid our rent on time for the past three years. Yes, thank you for that. That and a piece of toilet paper will wipe my fat ass.


I am so glad there are NO PILLS in this house right now…because MAN, would I love to do some and just go away for awhile. This is the time I miss doing drugs the most…when shit like this comes up. Instead, I have to put myself into “pitbull” mode and just start barking up every tree and see what comes down. I am really trying NOT to freak out. My mother is a real estate agent and knows the ins and outs of a short sale on foreclosure homes. My father is a mortgage banker and is going to do what he can to get us in a more eligable ready position to take on a mortgage. It’s going to be a bitch because I am not working. We can’t count any income from me at all. However, I have good credit. My husband on the other hand makes an excellent salary…but his credit sucks ass. And it’s not as if the banks are handing out loans with this shitty economy. Short of me sucking some banker dick, I don’t see how we are going to pull this off.

I am hoping Dad can pull a miracle out of his hat.

I am hitting an NA meeting first thing in the morning. 7am…just to be able to get all this off my chest. I gotta release some of this steam I have building up.

I hope I am never in Utah. I would feel compelled to fuck up some Crack Addict ass.

14 thoughts on “What the fuck is WRONG with people???

  1. Jessie

    Actually, banks are handing out loans at about 7% interest right now to people with ficos in the 580’s. I know because we’re buying a house. My husband delivers pizza and I am unemployed.

    There are, at least in cali, downpayment assistance programs. look into your area because we are getting 20% put down on our house from the county as a “neighborhood stabilization program.” they dont want all these foreclosed homes getting their windows boarded up so they’re making it FUCKING easy to get loans right now so people can move into them.

    We started with our ficos in the 540-560 range, we’ve paid a few old medical bills, and we’re hoping to get a 600 to secure the loan but we’re so almost there. We were approved for 120,000 which would = roughly a $780 mortgage including tax and insurance.

    Seriously, look into it. Just buy the house because what you think you know about the mortgage industry, like with the 4,000 a month mortgage payments and such, has ALL been flipped turned upside down, friend. Do not pop a pill and go “oh the banks arent giving out money” because they are.

    Those poor saps with the $4,000 mortgages’ faults are our gain. Go gain you some property.

  2. CP

    Jessie – Really? That’s interesting to me. My husband makes a low six figure salary. His credit just sucks though. Really bad. Don’t know what his FICO score is yet. We find that out from my father tomorrow when he runs the credit report. I didn’t work for the past year so despite my credit being good, I am worthless on paper. As far as we know, they are doing something called a “short sell” with the bank. Apparently, the house appraises for $183K but the bank will settle with them for $70K.

    $70K for this home? Hello? I am all over it. I just don’t know if we qualify for the mortgage. However, what I am hearing from you is that I shouldn’t feel entirely defeated just yet…that there is some hope out there. And I know the community association does NOT want a huge foreclosure sign on this property. It is a large corner property, very prominently displayed near the high school. They would die if their deed restricted community bore one of those signs!

    I am going to talk with Dad about what you told me. I am very intrigued by it. THANK you for posting this to me! You’re a ray of sunshine on my cloudy day!

    And no, no pills for me. I’m good. Just drowning myself in a bottle of Pepsi. Sure I’ll get fatter…but I’ll be clean!

    THANKS again!


    (Oh, and AWESOME about your potential home ownership! I’ll be sending you some good vibes. Good luck to you guys!)

  3. teebopop

    I don’t know what State you live in or I would send you links to apply for down payment assistance.

    MORE IMPORTANTLY, you MUST purchase this house and have the ink dried on the paperwork no later than Dec 1st because THEN you can amend your taxes for last year so that you can get the $8,000 tax credit (free money, you don’t have to pay it back) from the IRS.

    This is a fact. We bought our house in May, applied for the $8k, and received it in July WITH INTEREST because the IRS is so backlogged with applications. There are a couple of restrictions (can’t have owned a home in the last 3 years, and since you’ve said you’ve rented from the douche bag, you qualify for that).

    Here’s the link …

    So, even if you have to borrow the down payment (without telling the bank, of course, they frown on people who have to borrow the down payment), you positively get it back ($8000 at least).

    Talk to the bank. Tell them if they’ll sell you the house and guarantee to close BEFORE Dec 1st and they let you slide on the down payment, do it.

    I hope everything works out.

  4. teebopop

    I didn’t mean slide on the down payment, they’re going to want SOMETHING.

    But, the bank is in a desperate situation if they are foreclosing on the house.

    If you do the research, you’ll discover that there are hundreds of thousands of homes sitting in foreclosure and have been for over a year because of the crappy housing economy.

    Once you become armed with this information and THEN talk to the bank, you are sitting in a really good position to buy this house from the bank because they won’t have to lose a lot more money by evicting you then trying the sell the house to someone else.

    You don’t know me, but TRUST ME … you are in a good position right now.

    All you need to do is convince the bank that they’ll save thousands of dollars by making the deal with you now, and under your terms. (low or no down, property not empty for up to and over a year, etc etc etc.)

    Good luck.

  5. MB

    That bites. I hope things work out with the bank and you get to stay in your home. Did you have anything in writing saying you were renting to own? Was a portion of your rent supposed to be applied to the down payment? Maybe the crack addict can sign something saying that “X” amount of dollars of rent was applied to a downpayment of “X.” It may help.

    I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed everything works out. Don’t let the situation push you over the edge. Crack is whack.

  6. CP

    Tee – You’re a bucket full of awesome. I didn’t know any of that. I am going to get in touch with the attorney for the bank right away and see what we can do about this. I really don’t want to move. I love this house. I mean, if we HAVE to go, we will, but I’d prefer not to. Dad checked my husbands credit and verified that it is REALLY BAD. (He didn’t pay back some maxxed out credit cards back in 1999 when we were still dating.) All of that showed up. My husband, naively, was under the impression that things get “wiped away” after seven years. I thought that notion was ridiculous…and it was, apparently. We have 3 years worth of checks showing that we have always paid our rent on time, so hopefully, that will count for something with the bank.

    MB – Good point. I forgot that part of the money we gave them every month was supposed to be put aside for the sale of the house. There is also our “security deposit” which we should naturally be entitled to. Then again, this may be like pulling blood from a stone. More than likely, we will have to sue them…which I don’t mind. Whatever needs to happen will happen. I am trying to keep a tight grip on my bearings. Thank you for the really good advice!


  7. Pollyanna

    Well, you have some smart readers here, CP. Amazing! πŸ™‚ I really hope that everything turns out for you. I just moved. And it sucks. I loathe moving. OMG. Keep us posted!

  8. Wendy

    CP –
    I’m a lurker here, but wanted to say don’t give up – everyone on here is right. Banks will work with you to get you approved. Just be up front with them, and they’ll figure out what they need to do to get you approved. Don’t hide the fact from them that you borrowed the down payment – they will find that out via credit reports and all that paperwork that is done the day before closing. However, people borrow down payments all the time. In our situation we took out a “2nd mortgage” from the lady we bought our farm from for $12,000 or something like that. Our mortgage guy actually suggested it. Just hang in there and bark up those trees. Don’t freak out too bad – it will be ok. When we bought it, my husband was not working. I was the only one. And his credit was better than mine. If you can pick up that house for $70K, that would be SWEET!!! That’s a lot of equity, and that will count a long way for you. And, proof of paying rent on time is considered credit worthiness. But you might have to clear up those old credit cards before closing. Hang in there! Between your mom and dad, you have some good resources to tap. Take advantage of that too! Good Luck!

  9. Yo Momma

    What a fuckin bitch that whore was for taking your payments and not paying the mortgage. I know she wanted to fuck with her husband but didn’t she realize she was screwing you guys even worse for doing that? I seriously don’t know people can justify such ugly conniving behavior like that and still manage to get up in the morning and look at their despicable face in the morning.
    Regardless, I really hope it works out and you get to stay in your home.

  10. CP

    What probably makes me laugh more than anything is Ms. Crack Addict is a Mormon, a highly religious one at that.

    I don’t think this was a very Jesus like thing to do…but what the fuck do I know. I’m a Jew.



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